You get used to people asking how "you guys met". Each time you're asked this you wonder whether gay people get asked this question more than straight people, in case they think that how gay people meet is more interesting.
After about six months you've nailed this story down, like a comedian performing this as a stand-up routine. It's like you're on autopilot. Someone asks you. The tenth time? Two minutes to tell it all it.
You even start automatically giving yourself constructive criticism according to how they react. You think, "The llama joke caused Jessica to laugh more than it did with Daniel. Each time you tell it though, the facial expression of your audience is the same. It's the facial expression of a person slowly realising that your relationship story is no more interesting than a straight bloke talking about theirs. I don't even know what I'm having for dinner yet. You've thought about kids as much as any person your age, so you're tempted to say, "I'd rather have an iPad and a house with underfloor heating.
A good side to gay relationships? When you stay round their flat on a weeknight and you can't be bothered to go back to yours before work the next day, you can wear their clothes to work.
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Any of their clothes. Including their boxers. A bad side to gay relationships? You get used to wearing their clothes so much you don't go home. You're then constantly worrying that all of your housemates think you're dead. When doing romantic things you can experience problems. While having a romantic massage with your other half at a nice spa, for instances, the masseuses, thinking you're just male business associates on a business trip having a massage as a freebie, might ask things like, "So, how long have you been working together?
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Instead of explaining, "Oh, this is my boyfriend, we've been out for six months, the sex is good etc", you weirdly end up just going along with the "Yes, this is my business associate" play. You're not ashamed. You just can't be bothered to correct them. It's the same with checking into a hotel and finding you haven't got a double bed. You can go to the front desk to complain, or you can just slam your beds together. And sometimes the hotel gives you two rooms instead of one. At first you feel like walking up to the front desk explaining the situation, but then you think, "Fuck it, I don't want to wait for a shower in the morning.
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Bye bye boyfriend bye. TV provides very little help in your first gay relationship because you hardly ever see them portrayed. You've got nothing to go on. Most relationships depicted are full of scandal, or are short term. After a while you wonder where your relationship fits into this — the relationship where both of you pass out on the sofa after a chicken pasta dinner. What isn't missing is an acknowledgement of how far gay relationships have come.
96 Relationship Red Flags Every Woman Should Know
If you're lying when you call yourself a "versatile top," either call it quits now or start working on your oral communication skills. If he insists on taking "important calls" several times during your date, don't automatically think he's blowing you off. In today's complicated world, he might be calling work, his sitter, or his ex-wife to see if she can pick up the kids.
Chill out, and use the time to call your sponsor for encouragement. In the old days, it was common, and common sense, to say that, if you sleep with someone, you are also sleeping with everyone he's slept with. Nowadays, it's common sense to remember that, if you sleep with someone who's in a Step program, you are also sleeping with everyone in his Home Group.
Be prepared to be judged by all the members of the orgy. If you've met the guy online and have never met in person, and if his entire chat so far has been about how amazingly hot you are and how amazingly much he's into you and how he's quite certain you're the guy for him, he will hate you within 20 minutes of your date and you will never hear from him again. If you request an explanation, he will call you a stalker and block you from any social media sites you might share. While it's nice to have a grasp of current events and knowledge of local culture, it's no longer a first-date pre-requisite.
However, if you don't have an immediate answer for "Do you want to get married? Contrary to popular belief, opinions are not like assholes, because in today's gay world, assholes are glorious and sexy and displayed prominently in photos sent to you from potential suitors.
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Opinions on a date are more like your lesbian best friend: We know she's important to you and we're glad you have her, but we have no idea why you'd want to introduce us to her on a first meeting and turn the evening into a serious downer. If you do opt to discuss current events, avoid anything so controversial it will destroy potential chemistry, like Crimea, Obama's job performance, or the relevance of HBO's "Looking. Fashions change, so know the basics: No flip-flops, no shaving, and, even if it is after Memorial Day, absolutely no white underwear.
If you like the guy and want things to go well, put everything out on the table: HIV status, views on monogamy, and, for Florida residents, guns. It's a sign of a true gentleman if you walk him to his door and he says it's too soon for you to come inside. It's also more than likely a sign that he still lives with his on-again off-again ex. If, in the heat of the moment, you do find yourself in bed together after the date, remember to keep the foreplay going for at least 30 minutes.
This allows ample time for intimate kisses, exploring each other's body, and for the Cialis to kick in. Sadly, gay men are self-centered and narcissistic, so instead of talking about your abusive childhood upbringing and triumph over Legionnaires disease, read this piece over and over and out loud until I'm so happy I wet myself. We're a match!
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